A List of Sexy Things

I have two apologies to make this week.

First off, sorry there was no post last week; in light of everything that was happening in the media (and is obviously still happening), I didn’t feel it right for me to write something last week.

Secondly, sorry I didn’t post as usual yesterday - yesterday was rather busy and it completely slipped my mind.

So, this week I planned to write a post which I’ve ambiguously titled “a list of sexy things”. I’ve been debating all week about writing a different themed post for a few reasons, but no other ideas have come to mind, so I’ll just bite the bullet as it were. I suppose I’ll soon find out whether it was a good idea or not…

I’m sure most people can come up with a typical list of physical traits that they find attractive or sexy. This could be a nice set of abs, or it could be slightly more subtle, like a good smile.

Sometimes there are certain hobbies or activities that act as aphrodisiacs, such as certain sports.

As for me, most of what I find attractive is not what is stereotypically thought of attractive.

Unlike some girls, I’m not generally attracted to the bad boy. Or the sporty one (quite frankly being sporty is a bit of a turn off for me, sorry lads).

So, I thought it'd be fun to collate a list of all the things I find attractive:

Chess -

Yep, chess. Or any game that involves strategy really: cards (particularly poker for some reason), pool/snooker, board games, etc.

I remember saying this to friend of mine and him denying this as a thing vehemently, but it’s true. I think it’s because in my head I draw some link between these kinds of games and patience and intelligence, two things which could not be more sexy if you ask me.

Singers -

I love singing, and have a long history of all-girls singing, so I melt whenever I hear a guy sing. I don’t even care how good they are; hearing a guy singing just sets off something in my brain that makes me instinctively want to be closer to them. Can’t help it.

Guitarists/really any kind of musician -

Yet again, I love music, so it’s a total turn-on. But musicians have my total respect; as someone who’s been trying to be half decent at any instrument for most of my life, when I meet someone who can play an instrument, I’m instantly drawn to them.

Nerds -

I’m a self-confessed nerd, so when I find someone who can nerd-out to the same degree as I can, I’m happy. I will happily listen to someone nerd-out about their passion for hours, even if I have no idea what they’re talking about, because I just love that kind of enthusiasm. Suffice to say, when someone nerds out on literature as much as I do, I have to restrain myself ;)

Shoulders -

Probably the only physical thing that attracts me. Don’t get me wrong; I love a guy who is well-put together, or a guy with great hair, as much as the next person. But there’s something about a strong pair of shoulders that is undeniably attractive.

Genuine smile -

I don’t know what it is about a genuine smile, but it just melts me inside. I like to make people happy, I guess. When someone laughs or smiles, and I caused it, that makes me happy. When someone smiles, I smile. And I honestly believe that a smile makes someone instantly look better.

Good listeners -

I wouldn’t describe myself as someone who likes to talk about myself a load, but someone who remembers the stuff that you say is just really nice. That goes for everyone in general, of course, but it’s always a point in the pros column for me when I meet someone.

Taking control (but not in a jerky way) -

As a reasonably retiring and shy person, I like someone who is not scared to take the initiative. Someone who likes being a bit bold or dominant is probably someone who would really work with my quite passive nature.

Glasses -

I think that’s one similar to the intelligent link thing from earlier. But I’ve always found glasses incredibly sexy. Just me with that fantasy about the guy who chews on the stem of his glasses contemplatively when he’s trying to figure something out?

So, you may wonder why I put this list together as post. Why would you be interested in what I find attractive?

My best explanation is to remind you all that you don’t have to be stereotypically attractive to still be attractive to someone. We spend a lot of time in the media creating the image of the “perfect” woman or man. I wouldn’t describe myself as one of those “perfect” media people. Quite frankly, I don’t think that image is healthy for anyone.

When that ideal is pretty much all we see on a daily basis, it’s really easy to judge ourselves by those standards and feel we come up short in comparison. If you don’t have a huge social media following, a beautifully toned and tanned body, or you’re not the best at some really fashionable talent like TikToking or something, you’re just as valuable as someone who does have those things.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s good to remember we’re all different. And we all like different things.

So if you’re feeling a little bit unattractive right now given the international situation, or any time really, or like you’re not what other people are looking for, remember there’s definitely someone out there who will love you for everything that you are. They’ll find all your little habits sweet or fun and they’ll be interested in everything that interests you because you’re special to them.

And remember it’s ok to feel a bit down right now; just try and be kind to yourself when you can.

I’ll reuse one of my favourite quotes; “be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” One day, you’ll tick a lot, or maybe even all, of someone’s boxes of attractive things.

P.S. I'm in the middle of creating a very exciting project for new authors right now which I will hopefully be launching over the summer some time. I have a request that if any of you reading this are published authors (of any age) - online or in hard copy - or bloggers, and you'd be interested in helping me make this project the best it can be, please comment below or message me on Instagram @roxyelle01

#alistofsexythings #selflove #lockdown